7 Dec 2017

All aboard the Funemployment Express! How to not get the job.

As you may have seen in my previous post, I've recently joined the Funemployment Express and have been anxiously on a career hunt. Well, hours after writing about my frustrations of being a 23 year old expired young lady, I had a call to say that my application had been successful for an Events Marketing Assistant role.

I was bloody ecstatic! Finally! Someone is about to actually give me a chance to prove myself and potentially start a career with them. Ah.. wait, if only life was so simple...

So I arrived to my interview with 10 mins to spare... 15 is a little too eager when there's a day full of interviews and 5 is just cutting it too late. I entered the bar of the hotel where they were conducting the interviews to be greeted by the HR lady (who was definitely much younger than I), who I'd spoken with on the phone, and another potential candidate for the same job. We sat around a table, filled out yet another form and waited in anticipation to meet, who we were told, would be the director and founder of the company.

A few minutes passed while I was uncomfortably slagged off for being "one of those who goes to Australia. Everyone goes now don't they? Don't understand why..." Erm, thanks? Anyway, we were then both escorted through to the chap who'd be interviewing us. Yes, that's right, WE. He interviewed us both together...

When i'm employed i'm gonna explore again..
Singing Fountains, Margaret Island, Budapest Hungary.
So there I was, playing down my CV because the poor lass next to me had only ever worked in her families corner shop for 4 years and every time I was asked about my experience I felt like I was bragging. Then it becomes very clear that this guy wasn't the director of the company at all, but rather some guy he's hired to conduct his interviews... It's all sounding very dodgy at this point.

THEN, it gets worse. The guy draws a diagram. He explains "So to begin with you'll start in sales and customer services... then you'll go onto this.. and this... and this.. and in 10 months time you'll have your own office" Sorry love, you lost me at SALES. It all started making sense. They'd created an imaginary job role to lure naive and eager graduates who are desperate to start earning some dollar (like matey sat next to me) to fill their cold-calling sales positions.

I was GUTTED. I just addressed it immediately and said if this turns out to be a sales role then i'm sorry to have wasted your time as I'm not interested. He assured me it was more than that... Safe to say I never got the call back.

It's so annoying though. So I walked out of the interview with the knowledge I absolutely wouldn't be getting the job and even if I was offered it, did I even want it? I dragged my feet along, hopped onto my familiar seat on the Funemployment Express, whilst listening to Taylor Swift's first album and gazing out of the window just like a Hollywood movie.

Who's aboard with me?
Lemme know!

Just Write About It.
Raven Twigg
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